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Just before starting the New Year’s Weekthun (a week-long urban meditation retreat) at the Shambhala Meditation Centre of Toronto lead by Gaylon Ferguson of Shambhala International, I had come to two conclusions:
- My heart friend is not a friend to me. It’s a one-way street. I’m his friend. He is not mine. How he manifests towards me does not align with my core values, namely, basic human friendliness, concern and support — some of the attributes that are the hallmark of (relative) basic goodness; and
- While I honour whatever his own truth is at any given time, and understand from where he is coming, it does not mean that I choose to live with the situation.
So on Day One of the New Year’s Weekthun, I enter the shrineroom in a state of profound sadness. Like James Bond’s martinis, I am shaken, not stirred. Being stirred comes during the weekthun itself.
This sadness, as it turns out, is a perfect starting point for me where Peaceful Abiding and care for others can be practiced. Read the rest of this entry »